Ego?

Its something we all have.

For some of us, its something that we barely manage. For others, its something that points them in the direction they head towards in life. For very rare few, they manage to completely (and correctly) handle it so they never get too affected by it.

The wiki explanation goes like this"In modern-day society, ego has many meanings. It could mean one’s self-esteem; an inflated sense of self-worth; or in philosophical terms, one’s self. However, according to Freud, the ego is the part of the mind which contains the consciousness. Originally, Freud had associated the word ego to meaning a sense of self; however, he later revised it to mean a set of psychic functions such as judgment, tolerance, reality-testing, control, planning, defense, synthesis of information, intellectual functioning, and memory."To me, it is just the part in us that is permanently seeking validation. Now, to have self worth is definitely a good thing. In fact, I'd say it is necessary for any successful individual to have a strong sense of self worth. The ones who don't understand the true meaning of self worth, however, will have a warped view of reality. In their reality, the only way they can validate themselves, the only way way they can have self worth, is to constantly and infinitely prove explicitly that they are better than others in one way or another.

To those that belong to the latter, I have to say this.HOW FUCKING PATHETIC ARE YOU IDIOTS?

We all have a different way of viewing this skill set and the places we want it to take us. Some of us learned it to improve upon ourself as a person, some of us treat it as just a skill set and nothing more, some of us are in it for women, and only women.

I'm not gonna say who's right and who's wrong, but if you ask me, anyone with a decent bit of social intelligence and self respect will presumably be intelligent enough to see that there is a whole lot more to life than women. Knowing how to communicate and having success with women is definitely an essential skill all human males should have. The society we are put into doesn't exactly help us with it. As beings of the human race with a penis, we all need to , in the words of mystery, survive and replicate.

Thats the reason this community existed. THAT, is the reason this community and the subsequent coaches existed. This community was made to allow men to help each other with the problem that they were never taught to solve in school or in life. The rare few who 'got it' started this so they can help the other guys out and eventually help the person to fix this aspect of their life so they can move and fix the others.

Fixing this aspect, fixing the problem of women (or lack of), coincidentally, would help a whole load in fixing the other aspects too!

I am saddened by the fact that some have took this community as a way to prove that they are better than the others. Yeah, its an empowering thought, for a while. Its good to be competitive and all, but when you let it consume you, you end up a hollow shell. There's no substance in you, the only thing that keeps you going is the insatiable desire in you to constantly outdo others.

If anyone is really as good as they perceive themselves to be, they would never have that need to explicitly tell the whole world that they are the best.

That, to me, is just plain and simple pathetic.

PS: Are you tired of not being able to attract the women you want to attract or you’re stuck in the friendzone? If you’re and you want to change all of that, attend the Transformation Bootcamp we’re holding this coming month. We’ll show you how you can naturally attract women towards you 24/7.

http://www.modernman.sg/courses-2/transformational-bootcamp/Transformation Bootcamp

Attend our Transformation Bootcamp, you won’t regret it. It will be the best thing you ever.

Love,
Gate

Learning how to date girls in Singapore?

Learning how to date girls in Singapore?

I've always been open to various viewpoints on subjects, and i've always been pretty philosophical about stuffs. It's fun and it challenges and stretches our mind-rubberband. And out of curiosity, i went to wiki philosophy.

Damn, am i appalled at the branches of it. Aesthetics, logic, epistemology, metaphysics...etc. I shook my head, but i continued reading and discovering. It was scary. Scary to know that there are so so so so much more out there. And we can never stop discovering.

And i started to question. I started to question this "buzzing thought" i've always seems to have in my head.


*I don't wana know. I don't wana listen anymore. I know what i know. That is enough. Stop giving me anymore excess information. I am so tired*


Somehow, at every junction of learning something new, it never fails to pop out and wish me a good day. I question the reason. I question the reason why it seems to go away after i bust through all the brick walls and master a certain new skill.

As if saying : Oh now i ain't have any control over holding you back now..bye bye! And poof! Off it goes...

Ironic huh? Weird huh? But it happened. It happened and is still happening to me. Humans are effing lazy by nature. ROFL. That's just my personal take on it. =p

And so...it prolly might be directly proportionate to being complacent. Highly i would say. Imagine how incongruent it would feel to step out of your house and build a tent out there and sleep in it for a few days. You'll prolly feel eeky on the 2nd day onwards. You aint used to that condition yet. Not yet. Bear with it for a few more days.. and your tolerance level may well move up a notch...and it starts to feel better..it starts to feel pretty much normal and relaxing...you're starting to adapt.

And so...below is an abstract from wiki.. take note of the ones i highlighted in red.


Learning
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Learning is one of the most important mental function of humans, animals and artificial cognitive systems. It relies on the acquisition of different types of knowledge supported by perceived information. It leads to the development of new capacities, skills, values, understanding, and preferences. Its goal is the increasing of individual and group experience Learning functions can be performed by different brain learning processes, which depend on the mental capacities of learning subject, the type of knowledge which has to be acquitted, as well as on socio-cognitive and environmental circumstances.
Learning ranges from simple forms of learning such as habituation and classical conditioning seen in many animal species, to more complex activities such as play, seen only in relatively intelligent animals and humans. Therefore, in general, a learning can be conscious and not conscious.

For example, for small children, not conscious learning processes are as natural as breathing. In fact, there is evidence for behavioral learning prenatally, in which habituation has been observed as early as 32 weeks into gestation, indicating that the central nervous system is sufficiently developed and primed for learning and memory to occur very early on in development.
From the social perspective, learning is the goal of teaching and education.
Conscious learning is a capacity requested by students, therefore is usually goal-oriented and requires a motivation.

Learning has also been mathematically modeled using a differential equation related to an arbitrarily defined knowledge indicator with respect to time, and dependent on a number of interacting factors (constants and variables) such as initial knowledge, motivation, intelligence, knowledge anchorage or resistance, etc.[5][6] Thus, learning does not occur if there is no change in the amount of knowledge even for a long time, and learning is negative if the amount of knowledge is decreasing in time. Inspection of the solution to the differential equation also shows the sigmoid and logarithmic decay learning curves, as well as the knowledge carrying capacity for a given learner.


Physiology of learning

"Thought," in a general sense, is commonly conceived as something arising from the stimulation of neurons in the brain. Current understanding of neurons and the central nervous system implies that the process of learning corresponds to changes in the relationship between certain neurons in the brain.
It is generally recognized that memory is more easily retained when multiple parts of the brain are stimulated, such as through combinations of hearing, seeing, smelling, motor skills, touch sense, and logical thinking.
Repeating thoughts and actions is an essential part of learning. Thinking about a specific memory will make it easy to recall. This is the reason why reviews are such an integral part of education. On first performing a task, it is difficult as according to current theory synaptic modification is necessary for the task to be acquired. After several repetitions it is believed that structural changes occur in relevant synapses, thus rendering the task easier. When the task becomes so easy that you can perform it at any time, these structural changes have likely ceased.


Yep, and so it proves one thing, It may be that the unconscious is afraid of leaving the comfort zone and entering a new area where the previous skills it has since acquired will not be the essential moving piece in the new situation. It will highly be neglected. You ain't gona talk about your knowledge of stocks and shares on a date.. and just by omitting the already acquired knowledge..it prolly threatens the ego to let go. To release the tension is has been holding on to..and jump into a new environment to pick up something new and unlearnt.

And it pretty much proved my experiences. There can never be a ceasation of human learning process. When it ceases...you fall onto the negative side of the graph. Pretty scary.

Learning is an everyday thing. For anybody who thinks they hit a plateau in self improvement...back to basics.. You probably in some point of your life resisted new information. You resisted change. You resisted the learning curve. Thus, you prolly plunge way back down. The deeper down you go, the more effort it's gonna take you to climb.

Past students reading this....there isn't any magic pill anymore....the only magic pill is to climb. Stretch your mind-rubber...and keep stretching....for that's what life is about. If you aint stretching...be damn sure you are already dead. Every effort to stretch requires energy and motivation.....and every energy and motivation present represents every second of life. If you are still alive and kicking....ain't no excuse for you not to learn new skills.

Till then, love.

PS: Are you tired of not being able to attract the women you want to attract or you’re stuck in the friendzone? If you’re and you want to change all of that register for your free 1 on 1 coaching session with us.

http://www.modernman.sg/courses/free-coaching-session/

Love,
Gate. 

Why phone numbers don't mean a thing.

Most guys feel that getting a phone number is equivalent to scoring a goal.

They place far too much importance in it.

Reason is simple. It could be fake, or she may not even answer unknown calls.

Girls give out numbers for all kinds of reasons.

1. She may need some kinda ego boost at that moment
2. She likes u but decided against investing more as there was no/ not enough qualification/attraction done during the interaction
3. She wants to have guys calling/ msg-ing her just to 'kill-time' and show to her friends for social proof
4. She felt embarassed not to give it to you even though she wasn't attracted to you e.g. introduced by common friend

However, a ladies man understands that a phone number is a natural occurence in a successful set. A successful set prior to a phone number is defined as:

1. Attraction created
2. Qualified her ("push-pull")
3. Rapport and connection built (sharing of dreams, vulnerabilities,)

My girlfriend's a natural at doing that (mostly giving out due to common friends, then complaining about chumps bothering her).

Oh, I'm shouldn't be talking about her in public. Lol.

So guys.. getting a phone number means nothing if you haven't done the above 3 steps. Unless she's bored and wants to kill time, she probably won't entertain you for long or at all. If you've done the 3 steps well or ran tight game, she will offer the number to you.

Refer to the post on the phone calls on "how not to mess it up". First 8 lines of your phone dialogue will probably make or kill you as well.

This shit is tough, but nobody ever said it was easy.

Your Friend,
Gate

Amazing how things change.

It's amazing.

I was walking back from supper and I spotted a cute girl with her boyfriend (apparently) from a distance away.

The first thought that crossed my mind was: "She may not be happy in that relationship."

The next was: "Wow.. 8 years ago I would have thought otherwise."

Now, I'm not saying that it's a good way to think, but it's literally universes apart from how most people would see things, given the same situation, isn't it?

Typical thought-pattern of convention thinking:

"Oh she's attached.. .too bad."
"She has a boyfriend.. forget it, what's the use of even trying?"

And so it ends there... or does it?

Let's just say my point-of-view opens up a whole new world of possibilities. In that instance I could decide to find out if she's happy with her current situation.

Instead of "too bad", I wondered "what if she isn't happy?".

So it came to the conclusion that people do and can change. It just takes time, effort and the willingness to.

Inner game takes a long time for most people. Guys in this community often encourage the development of both outer and inner game. They compliment each other.

Sitting at home reading 10 hours of self-improvement books won't help if you don't get out there and experience it first hand.

Going out there with no technique, adequate skills nor the appropriate mindset for 10 hours will only teach you what not to do the next time, and perhaps if you're lucky, you find something that works. Worse if you never learn from your mistakes.

Do both. Join our theory classes and our In field classes where we meet women together in real life situations.

Life is always good. Be a great guy.

Success with Women, are you ready for it?

Are you ready for this?
Are you ready to take the plunge?
Are you ready to go on this awesome self improvement journey?
Are you ready to kill your former self and completely remould your character?

ARE YOU READY?

Well, I've heard all sorts of replies ranging from the most enthusiastic "YES" to the most apprehensive "Uh... I dunno"

Nobody ever said this is going to be easy, neither did anyone say that it will be smooth sailing. It happens for a good reason. This journey, is going to be TOUGH.

Your mettle is gonna be tested time and again.
Your ego is gonna be smashed into pieces so brittle you'll lose sight of it.
Your friends, some of them, are going to scorn you for actually taking the step they have been running away from.
Your confidence will be brought down to levels and depths of an all time low.
Your discipline to keep going will be ruthlessly questioned.
YOU, are going to be smacked and bashed so many times, you will give it up if you are any lesser of a man than this demands.

Now before you take on this journey, I want you to ask yourself this question, with the above statements thrown in. If you are ready, if you are willing, then let me welcome you to this world, and the kind of things you can achieve.

You will be able to experience life and see things through eyes you never knew you possessed.
You will be able to walk through life with so smooth a swagger you will command the world.
You will have the ability to make heads turn just by simply walking into a room.
You will have so many more options in life you'll be spoilt for choice.
You'll never have to worry about the lack of female company in your life.
You will be the man women want.
You will be the man other men want to be.
You, will be, THE MAN.

Will you be afraid of the sacrifices you have to make and back out of it?
Will you take the first step but cower in fear of the things you have to break out of?
Will you refuse to budge from your comfort zone, knowing you have that bit of success and remain ever so desperate to cling onto it?
Will you take the step, take the plunge, and emerge a new man?

Which of the above 4 would be the question that pertains to you?

Think it through.

Anxiety and a new perspective towards taking care of it.

Many of us prolly might have experienced anxiety before. What kinda anxiety? You know. That tingling-heart pumping-breathless feeling you get when you fancy a cute girl, and found it so darn hard to just go up and say hi. It is normal. If anyone would tell me straight in my face : "Oh i never have anxiety", i prolly wouldn't take him seriously. I had, and still have. Yes, i'm pretty darn honest. And im fine with it. What's different is prolly the different ways we tackle this issue. Some experienced it, and crawled back to their shells and start comforting themselves....some, the better ones..tend to recognise it, and just go through the motions. Walk up. "Hi, how are you?" Some guys even have anxiety while talking to a fellow male. Before you even call him a chump and start laughing hysterically at him...think. What rights do you have to make this judgement about him? You have no rights. It is normal. Throughout these years, i have experienced several incredible growth spurts. I wouldn't say all of them are good or bad..but i prolly wouldn't change anyone of them if i were given a chance. And i proly wouldn't consider myself any different from many guys out there. In terms of individual thinking, yes. But that is just it. Sometimes, i am impressed by my past clients for example Ryan. I learnt alot from just watching him transformed. Lesson i got out of this?

PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS IN THEIR OWN HEADS.

People allow themselves limitations. And you can never be too sure of anything. Because things change..as experience comes in. Be sure of yourself now, in this present moment. Because this is the time you have complete control. This article i am churning out now isn't a complete "cure". No..it is simply just a new perspective ...a signpost...to lead us to our individual purpose in life. What guy A gets out of this material is different from what guy B does. The first time i saw him, he was quiet and reserved. What people might call an "afc". But not in the eyes of mine. He had reservations about his life situations. Progress is tough. But guess what..i look at him now, he is a complete changed man. Maybe not all that sanely...but at least he had made very impressive progress. Go to him for humour lessons. I can vouch for that. =) So much for stories..lol..lets go on to the meat of this article.I do not know how you view anxiety..and i am not going to put a price on it. However, this is how i currently see it..as it is.....

Anxiety isn't a bad thing afterall. Some people say to view it as adrenaline..and "just know it is a good feeling" ..then you are able to remove negative thoughts and just do it. Well, good idea..but doesn't work for me. Have to find out what works for YOU. Not everybody. I view anxiety as spark pugs for growth. Take this analogy...anxiety is like bodybuilding. Each and everytime you lift weights, you are in actual fact breaking down your muscles, and matter of fact, they are going through a stage of atrophy. They are getting smaller. But guess what? It starts growing almost compoundingly..as you start eating right, sleeping enough...and training more...and the cycle goes on. It gets bigger and bigger. So anxiety can be viewed similarly. With anxiety..it is giving you a "push" to go do an approach..and who cares if you crash and burn? Who cares if you got rejected. It doesn't matter. What is in fact happening is this. Each and everytime you get your reality shattered, you grow. YES.EACH AND EVERYTIME YOU GET YOUR REALITY SHATTERED, YOU GROW.

I hope this article provides some kinda value to you guys out there.

What If?

What if she reject me?
What if she doesn't respond?
What if she say fuck off?
What if she slap me?
What if her friends drag her away?
What if she have a boyfriend?
What if she's lesbian?

Sounds familiar? Yes, the above thoughts, not exhaustive by any means, is what is usually going through guys when they are approaching women in Singapore. The fear of the approach and is known as approach anxiety.

Approach Anxiety.

Did the above 2 words just freak you out? If it did, don't worry, it normal.

Everyone get approach anxiety. EVERY LIVING BREATHING HUMAN. GIRLS INCLUDED

See, even guys who are successful with women get approach anxiety.

Whats the difference between the guy who is successful and the guys who not?

A guy who not successful with women let approach anxiety overcome him and stay in his little corner in a club, do nothing all night, and feel like shit.

A ladies men can think to himself "Fuck this shit, I'm going in". and get rejected, and subsequently get the number of the next 5 approaches he open.

Think about it.

Presence, the secret attraction tool.

Everyone looks the same. Everyone acts the same. Even if you are dress really well, you still look the same...which of course varies to the individual 3rd party view. How do you differentiate yourself? I do not advocate teaching people powerful routines to carry off a complete pick up. Develop your personality first, then add in those routines. Take it right here, if you are a empty vessel, routines are just gonna be useless. Yes, you can be completely flawless by throwing routines after rountines..great..if that's what you are doing..then I'm happy for you. However, I know...that deep down...deep down when you are alone, in your room...you mind starts running. Just like the same old feelings that hurts so much, that pierce your heart, that breathless moment...that point of time during your childhood that you felt your parents love your sibling more then they love you. Nothing helps. More routines can never take the permanent scar away. You have to love yourself. Accept the presence given to you. You, like me is going to start from scratch, spend time and effort building the life you, like me love. You, like me enjoy.

Be it wherever you are, your presence is the strongest being in the world. You presence is what creates your reality. Presence is directly proportionate to consciousness, and consciousness is directly proportionate to forming your own world, which is also directly proportionate to forming the bubble around you that protects you from the shit test by the cougars out there. The fact that they are all interlink, only proves that in whatever you do, you have to start from scratch and start with the root. Think about it...we'll talk soon when I'm back from my trip to Taiwan.

Your Friend,
Gate

Loving Women. An Artform

You probably have encounter them. You probably have had your balls shattered by them. You probably feared them. Or you may be the lucky one, to love them and be loved by them in return.

Seriously...girls are humans after all. Besides the fact that most of them have been brainwashed by agony gurus...they are loving creatures. Before I even continue...

First things first: Never take things personally.

Girls are beautiful creatures beaming with emotional energy. They are cute. They make your life pretty and bouncy. Picture barney and the purple dinosaur. Yes...this is the exactly feeling that you should get when you interact with a girl. Appreciate their emotional ups and downs, accept the fact that they are who they are. And what they are, EMOTIONAL creatures. Don't ever try to change them. Without them, you are never alive. Love them with all you can.

With so much talk about loving them. How do we actually go about doing it? You might be experienced uptight girls, suspicious ones who go: "get a better pickup line!" When you genuinely want directions to the nearest gents...you might even have experience with fickle minded ones who go: "I feel so confused, I think I am just not ready for you love", when you shower her with all the affection she said she wanted Confused ? Don't be.

Accept the way things are. Matter of fact, men and women are build differently. Women can never understand men, and men can never understand women...unless they both decide to take on the journey of learning about the opposite sex, and dwell deeply into evolution psychology. Women don't want what they say they want. You have to be able to the codes. When i talk about love, I am not talking about obsession, needing , or even an outcome. Loving girls is non-judgemental and patient. It's about appreciation of her famine being, and whatever she feels like being right now. Whatever her mood is. Look at women for who they really are. Symphatise on a deep level with what they have to go through. Understand that they have to deal with wild and random emotions and mood swings, and they can't just trust any guy that comes up to them. Appreciate their imperfection and funny antics. When they sit down with you and spit out random illogical stuff stuffs, listen to them...understand that it is part of their emotional circuitry.

Women are fun people. Tickle them. Play with them. Go crazy. Nobody says you have to be all so serious faced with them...and talk serious subjects. After all, life is a fun process.

For guys out there...to sum it all, girls want a men who is able to lead and live life with purpose.

The next time you decide to get all upset and affected when faced with shit that girls throw at you...don't be. The only person who has the power to affect your emotions is YOU. The next time you decide to get involved in an argument with a women, STOP. You can never win.

We at datingskillset have always taken on the mindset that girls are awesome. You should too! They are lovely people with a myriad of emotions. Even to the point where we happen to meet an unstable and uptight one...who do not hesitate to "castrate" us mentally and emotionally...we just shrug it off. Never will you become overly protective of yourself, become violent or verbally aggressive. I have seen tons of guys acting this way. Sadly...some were grown adults. We man, have a part to play in every interaction with girls. It is obviously a balance of the sex. It is what I call value ping.

Always be friendly. Uptight people will lead an uptight life. Well, if you find this post intriguing...yes, thanks...after all, men like us are rare.

A Sneak Peek On Our Dating Courses!

Here's a sneak peek into exactly what kind of stuff we talk about in our Approach Courses ( The Day Approach & Night Approach).

What exactly is attractive to women? what is it about certain man that makes them so irresistible to women? Have you ever had a friend who walks into a party, socializes with everyone, and then later you hear " oh my god he's so charming, he's so attractive, he's so funny".

It all boils down to one thing communication. It all about how you package your values, ideals, qualities, and communicate it across to others. If your values, ideals are strong enough, they will want it. It's a lot like sales, but nothing like sales. You do not want to appear like you're trying when you are. You do not want to appear like you want their attention when you do.

Make sense? It shouldn't. What you are about to learn is the answer to everything here that i just posed. Be prepared for change. HUGE changes. You will get some of your beliefs shattered, and make damn sure you will be taken aback by some of the radical ideals that are directly against the societal norm.

You are not here for a quick fix solutions. You are not here to look for some simple solution to problems you have faced all your life. You are not here, for only learning how to pick up women. You are here for learning how to build a new life. A new way of leading life. A new way of getting your thoughts across and having them accepted.

PS: Do Check our website www.modernman.sg for more information on the Approach Courses.

A New You.

Get Ready.

Directionless.

I recently had a conversation with a chump friend who approached me for dating advice. After giving him the crash course, i got this.

"aite... aiyah...if it happens it happens... I not that gian for a relationship now."

THAT, is completely retarded.

Having directions in life is so crucial, no would get anywhere with out it. The process is the juice, we all know it, but we at least have to know what are the results.

Emphasizing it too much or too little is another question all together.

If you do not know what you want to achieve at work, you'll will never achieve anything.
If you do not know what you want out of school, you'll will leave school with nothing.
If you do not know where you want to be as a human, you're as good as dead.
If you 're gonna leave it to chance, you chance will never come.

Luck is achieved by those who create and actively seek out opportunities for LUCK to be present.

A directionless person is even worse than the chumps at a club's dance floor hoping to get lucky. At least the chumps are doing something, albeit doing it the wrong way.

Before anyone wants to take on the journey of learning the arts, think this is hard and think it through. Do you have what it takes?

We all do as a matter of fact , but how far are you willing to go to get your desired results?

How much efforts are you going to put in? Are you going to be another one of those who only wants to read about others males, other SUPERIORS MALES, knowing damn well that it is achievable, but NOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT?

If you belong to the category of people I just mentioned. I have two golden words for you.

FUCK

OFF

But if you want to sincerely change, like some of the clients I've have an immense amount of pleasure working with , approach us by all means.

I will help you to be successful with the girls, if you're willing to be helped.

I can only give you the tools and guidance necessary, we can't force you to do it at gunpoint.

Not that I'd waste the time doing that, really.

Growth.

Each purpose, each mission, is meant to be fully lived to the point where it becomes empty, boring, useless. Then it should be discarded. This is a sign of growth, but you may mistake it for a sign of failure.

I am not going to post any stuff on routines or regular material that can be easily researched. Any aspiring PUA wannabe can learn tons and tons of routines...as you may know...they are just training wheels..to lead you to the door of calibration. I want you guys to ponder over those words above..for those who get it...a small little sentence could well become a spark plug for your evolution.

Many guys will often encounter a phase in their journey towards getting successful with women. And this phrase, whether you acknowledge or not...it gonna look you in the eye..one fine day..when you least expects..and tell you.."Hey, you are getting tired ..and you have been approaching so much..yes..you may have some mediocre successes..some number closes...and you're now able to open sets easily and carry off an interesting conversation..so, what now? It's so freaking boring and you know it..to keep doing it again and again...It's useless.." And when you start to feel this sense of emptiness and boredom in you..you say to yourself..."This journey is tough as shit...I wouldn't be like the best guys... and all i can do is number close..and then expect flakes from the women. I'm useless...maybe I should do something else." Man, guys...now go back up and look at that phrase again.....do you see it? It's telling you...you've basted through you limits.. it time to move on...learn something new...add some new values to your life...I'm gonna tell you to be really selfish here....DO IMPROVE YOURSELF NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS. FUCK EVERYTHING THAT STOPS YOU. LEARN THE WAY OF ACCEPTING WHAT IS..AND LEARN TO SURRENDER TO THE CURRENT MOMENT...(i know it tough, but you have to do it. YOU HAVE TO BE A MAN ABOUT THIS ) AND GIVE LOVE TO THE PEOPLE WHO CROSSES PATH IN YOUR LIFE GENEROUSLY. There will be a time when you will be dealing with emotions face on. You will look emotions in the eye...and you will feel terrible....it is ok... it is ok to feel this way...it is ok to feel afc at times..but..what differate a man from a wimp.. " A real man feel terrible over a specific situation.. and he feel emotional about it...he feel afc-ish but he is able to identify this dysfunction..and start being aware of it..and fight it back..to break out of all this mind fuck he is giving himself and stand up again. He knows that when he do that..he is another level closer to his superiority. A wimp, feel terrible and drowns his sorrow in tears...constantly telling himself how painfully it feels and fails to identify the dysfunction...and carry on being a wimp. You do not need to be a superhero, you do need to cordon off all your fears and afc feeling away from you ....be aware that it is normal...but do stand up again...that's how you bust through plateaus.

How Do I Find The Energy To Approach?

Yeah, it's one the biggest problems guys are facing. We are have a life, we all have a day job, we all have to WORK (or study).

Lots of people would go " how am I am supposed to approach and meet new people when I've just work 8 hours?" or the likes.

Well, how do we go about getting that energy and positive vibe back after a gruelling 8 hours of enduring irritating colleagues, over demanding bosses, and down right retarded customers?

My answer to this: You don't. Quoted from an awesome PUA whose name I don't remember ( sorry bro, lol. Let me know if you see this, I'll credit you),

"Pickup doesn't start the moment you enter the club, It's start the moment you open your eyes."
You want to feel good all the time and not just when you are approaching women but on a daily basis. Get that postive energy and vibe everyday!

Here a simple exercise you can do to make yourself feel better. Here how it done.

The moment you wake up , close your eyes and clear your thoughts.
Keep telling yourself: I'm positive, full of life, fun and interesting.
Now picture that sentence in you, in the middle of you.
Once you feel the vibe, locate it's centre, it's gonna be right in the middle of the words.
Imagine the words expanding , filling your insides, filling your whole body.
See the words in you, feel the vibe in you, feel it expanding , feel it taking over and influencing every little micro-organism in you.
Now that it's at it peak, imagine it EXPLODING. Like BAM!

Open your eyes and you'll feel like you've clinched a million dollar deal, bang a hot chick, and in the process got a promotion to the position your most hated boss used to hold on to.

If you do this everyday, you'll begin the day in an extremely positive manner. Talk to everyone, be nice to them, say hi to your neighbours in the lift, say hi to that poor ugly colleague whom nobody talk to.

You rule, it's your world.

Take it over.

Building A Life.

Have you ever wondered how some people have really awesome life, and some just do the same old boring thing day after day...until they get old? It doesn't take a fool to know that you have totally control over your own life. And it doesn't take a fool to know that the results you get are determined by your responses. As a matter of fact, view your life as a movie. You are the actor of the movie. If you are make it past 70 years old , you are basically living only 28,000 days at max. You have to do something about it. One life one chance and this your chance to decide how you would want to live your live.

Do not get me wrong here, I'm not telling you to go hit somebody or even kill someone. You might be damn kidding right? Start doing the things you really wanted to do, but have always held you back due to the excuses you have given yourself like " I don't have the time". " What would others think of me". " My parents won't allow" ect. The more excuses you have, the more fear you have and only return to "NOTHING".

One of the things life boils down to are SURVIVE and REPLICATE. You obviously do not survive, unless you are a immortal. Which of course is not possible. What you can do, is to survive tough and rocky life situations. There are no problems in life. Only situations. And how we deal with situations reflects directly on how it will turn out. A rule of the alpha, BE UNREACTIVE. Simply means, be unaffected by external factors. It's tough to do, but yes it can happen. If you practice, if you are conscious enough. Be present and in the moment. If somethings terrible happens, you do not fall into the unconsciousness and allow your emotions to control you. You simply acknowledge the presence of the situation and know it there. It doesn't affect affect you on a deep level. I'm not telling you to be emotionless. It about controlling your emotions. If you let it run wild, you start falling into an irrational state of mind, and you're like a crazy bull running around the place, not towards a red cloth, but a black one. Start taking charge of your emotions, when you are able to do that, you will and i promise...be able to feel so much in control.

Replication, of course comes in when you start building families. I'm not gonna touch on this too much. if you cannot even survive, how would you replicate? Start building a life. Join a dance class, go take up martial arts classes, go do some water sports, go travelling...talk to strangers...make new friends. If you can start doing this right now, you will start to feel that time is limited. And you will start to realise the importance of every being in the world. You have to be happy with what you do. What I'm revealling here isn't rocket science, but basic logic. BASIC IS GOLD. talk about stories of value , you will have millions of them without even thinking of them, or trying to come out with one. Because you have such a awesome life. Start now and live the life you want to live.

How Do I Start A Conversation?

Yes, the number one question for all the guys that is just starting out.

The moment you think about how to open (start a conversation), the women SMELLS it. The moment you look in their direction like you're churning your brain juices thinking of how to open, they SMELLS it. The moment you ASK the mentor/PUA/Instructor beside you how to open, they SMELLS it.

A lot of guys starting out put way too much thought into an opener, An opener is not meant to attract, it is not meant to seduce, it is not meant to build value ( although i usually have value via, pre-selection, body language and tonality).

It is used, to open. It doesn't and shouldn't last more than a minute.

More often than not , the opener DOES NOT MATTER. It is how your handle the responses.

I do not go " OMG WHAT A HOT GIRL HOW DO I OPEN". I go " Hi guys , do you happen to know what is an angina?

It could also be as simple as "Hi, how are you" or as cheeky as "Hey you are kinda cute but I'm cuter."

The point is , stop thinking about how to open. OPEN FOR GOD'S SAKE. Women move, they are human, they might wanna dance, they might wanna leave, they might even get picked up by a PUA who doesn't waste 15 minute thinking about opening and getting rejected in the process. He just be in moment and have a great time.

If you really, really need help, open another women. Open the girls right beside you, right beside them, whatever. Take note though, this can, and will waste 15 minute of the time where you got could've been building major rapport and attraction with your target.

Welcome!

Welcome to the modernman.sg blog.

Most guys in Singapore lack the vital skill set to be successful with women. Pretty much what they know about women and attraction are completely wrong and not true, thus causing them to miss out on a lot of potential relationship and sexual opportunities one can have.

My name is Gate and I am a Dating Coach from Singapore. My aim is to educate you with proven strategies that will help you to be successful with women here in Singapore as well as most parts of Asia . Here, I will be sharing my honest thoughts, experience, tips and advice on how you can attract and date the women of your dreams. The blog will be updated on a weekly basis so do keep a look out for new articles. To receive the weekly updates on the newsletters, go to http://www.datingskillset.com/ and remember this guys. Success with women IS a choice. It's all possible only by making a decision as to whether you want to get this part of your life handled.

P.S Do check out our website http://www.modernman.sg/ regarding the courses available

Your Friend,
Gate