I recently had a conversation with a chump friend who approached me for dating advice. After giving him the crash course, i got this.
"aite... aiyah...if it happens it happens... I not that gian for a relationship now."
THAT, is completely retarded.
Having directions in life is so crucial, no would get anywhere with out it. The process is the juice, we all know it, but we at least have to know what are the results.
Emphasizing it too much or too little is another question all together.
If you do not know what you want to achieve at work, you'll will never achieve anything.
If you do not know what you want out of school, you'll will leave school with nothing.
If you do not know where you want to be as a human, you're as good as dead.
If you 're gonna leave it to chance, you chance will never come.
Luck is achieved by those who create and actively seek out opportunities for LUCK to be present.
A directionless person is even worse than the chumps at a club's dance floor hoping to get lucky. At least the chumps are doing something, albeit doing it the wrong way.
Before anyone wants to take on the journey of learning the arts, think this is hard and think it through. Do you have what it takes?
We all do as a matter of fact , but how far are you willing to go to get your desired results?
How much efforts are you going to put in? Are you going to be another one of those who only wants to read about others males, other SUPERIORS MALES, knowing damn well that it is achievable, but NOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT?
If you belong to the category of people I just mentioned. I have two golden words for you.
FUCK
OFF
But if you want to sincerely change, like some of the clients I've have an immense amount of pleasure working with , approach us by all means.
I will help you to be successful with the girls, if you're willing to be helped.
I can only give you the tools and guidance necessary, we can't force you to do it at gunpoint.
Not that I'd waste the time doing that, really.
Showing posts with label Dating Advice For Men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dating Advice For Men. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Saturday, September 11, 2010
How Do I Start A Conversation?
Yes, the number one question for all the guys that is just starting out.
The moment you think about how to open (start a conversation), the women SMELLS it. The moment you look in their direction like you're churning your brain juices thinking of how to open, they SMELLS it. The moment you ASK the mentor/PUA/Instructor beside you how to open, they SMELLS it.
A lot of guys starting out put way too much thought into an opener, An opener is not meant to attract, it is not meant to seduce, it is not meant to build value ( although i usually have value via, pre-selection, body language and tonality).
It is used, to open. It doesn't and shouldn't last more than a minute.
More often than not , the opener DOES NOT MATTER. It is how your handle the responses.
I do not go " OMG WHAT A HOT GIRL HOW DO I OPEN". I go " Hi guys , do you happen to know what is an angina?
It could also be as simple as "Hi, how are you" or as cheeky as "Hey you are kinda cute but I'm cuter."
The point is , stop thinking about how to open. OPEN FOR GOD'S SAKE. Women move, they are human, they might wanna dance, they might wanna leave, they might even get picked up by a PUA who doesn't waste 15 minute thinking about opening and getting rejected in the process. He just be in moment and have a great time.
If you really, really need help, open another women. Open the girls right beside you, right beside them, whatever. Take note though, this can, and will waste 15 minute of the time where you got could've been building major rapport and attraction with your target.
The moment you think about how to open (start a conversation), the women SMELLS it. The moment you look in their direction like you're churning your brain juices thinking of how to open, they SMELLS it. The moment you ASK the mentor/PUA/Instructor beside you how to open, they SMELLS it.
A lot of guys starting out put way too much thought into an opener, An opener is not meant to attract, it is not meant to seduce, it is not meant to build value ( although i usually have value via, pre-selection, body language and tonality).
It is used, to open. It doesn't and shouldn't last more than a minute.
More often than not , the opener DOES NOT MATTER. It is how your handle the responses.
I do not go " OMG WHAT A HOT GIRL HOW DO I OPEN". I go " Hi guys , do you happen to know what is an angina?
It could also be as simple as "Hi, how are you" or as cheeky as "Hey you are kinda cute but I'm cuter."
The point is , stop thinking about how to open. OPEN FOR GOD'S SAKE. Women move, they are human, they might wanna dance, they might wanna leave, they might even get picked up by a PUA who doesn't waste 15 minute thinking about opening and getting rejected in the process. He just be in moment and have a great time.
If you really, really need help, open another women. Open the girls right beside you, right beside them, whatever. Take note though, this can, and will waste 15 minute of the time where you got could've been building major rapport and attraction with your target.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Process Over Outcome, Do you really understand?
Well, So much has been said about process over outcome. It seems like another philosophy that is being passed down from old age sages, and further pre-packaged into new found enlightenment and thus being passed down again to individuals. However, how does all this intertwine with one another? It is all so easy to just go on and reiterate this powerful belief, hoping that it would skyrocket a person's progress towards succeeding with women in Singapore. Well, not exactly.
Am i messing with your head now?
Most people would go, "I don't get what you mean. How do you enjoy the process when you know the outcome might be an ugly one?" There's a lot of unwiring that needs to be done. And attempting to understand without experiencing is a definite no-brainer.
Enjoying the process, in this case communicating with the opposite sex is directly proportionate to your inner purpose. Your primary purpose is not concrete enough, you cannot enjoy the process. With a lot of guys out there who hit the clubs and the streets, i would say that they think their primary purpose is to polish their skills. I'm generalising here, so do bear with me. It is alright and nothing wrong. It probably is a social conditioning in the "PUA" kingdom". And most times, social conditioning creeps into you without you even knowing, If you are truly enjoying the process, you would not feel an inch of incongruency. Think aobut it. If in any case you feel incongruent in the field, uncomfy...or whatever...it is not your skills, or what you did, or what you said. It is your purpose. YOU GOT IT ALL MESS UP.
This is what most guys do:
Primary purpose ----> Polish up skillset
Secondary purpose ----> Enjoying a genuine interaction/making new friends
I'm not saying this is what you should do, or "do not". It's basically my interpretation of this issues. Beliefs change they are never a constant. If they were a constant, evolution probably can never take place. The face that the primary purpose of most guys is to polish their skills, creates a gaping hole in them which allows critisisms to take place. Criticisms can be rejections etc. And not many guys can learn from it the smart way.
Enjoying the process simply means enjoying the process. Nothing else. In order to do that, your attention and purpose has to be ONE. Your primary purpose allows your full attention to flow into your doing...and your secondary purpose is whatever you want to achieve through the doing. Which obviously is the outcome.
This is what i do:
Primary purose ----> Enjoying a genuine interaction/making new friends
Secondary Purpose ----> Polish up skill set
When you take a step, it is your primary purpose. And the destination is your secondary purpose. In many cases, me being guilty of it in the past, i was not really enjoying my interactions with people in the clubs and on the streets. I was desperately sourcing out for indicators of interest and what not. So i could further calibrate myself what a dumb ass i am and it does not mean you neglect what needs to be done on a practical level. It does not mean ignorance. In fact, the doing and process becomes much easier, when the dimensions of attention is acknowledges and so becomes primary . Quality requires attention. Sometimes when I'm whacked, i get shitty results in field. And its great that i have the ability to identify the dysfunction in me at that moment and immediately rectify the whole interaction. Every time was genuine. Nothing was memorized. And often guys asked "what did you say?" "How many indicator of interest did she give?". My answer I DON'T KNOW. It was fun. That's it. I figured a long time ago, that there are probably two ways for me to evolve my game.
1) Be an ass about dynamics, break it down like a robot and get good results, but in me i feel nauseous and burn out.
2) Follow my senses, purpose and enjoy the freaking process of getting to know another human being, sacrificing a little percentage of success rates. But feel congruent and genuine deep down. And even if the approach did not work out, it doesn't affect me.
I chose the second one. It was touch choice. The mental masturbation was terrible. But i recognise a fact. I am human.
Enjoying the processes, over destinations. After all aren't we all searching for that one thing? Happiness? Physical relationships are simply awesome by products of great interaction. It is not an end. By realizing that your entire life journey consists of the step you are taking at this moment. There is only this one step and so you will give your fullest attention to it. This doesn't mean you don't know where you are going. It just means this step is primary, the destination is secondary. What you encounter at your destination once you get there depends on the quality of this one step.
Am i messing with your head now?
Most people would go, "I don't get what you mean. How do you enjoy the process when you know the outcome might be an ugly one?" There's a lot of unwiring that needs to be done. And attempting to understand without experiencing is a definite no-brainer.
Enjoying the process, in this case communicating with the opposite sex is directly proportionate to your inner purpose. Your primary purpose is not concrete enough, you cannot enjoy the process. With a lot of guys out there who hit the clubs and the streets, i would say that they think their primary purpose is to polish their skills. I'm generalising here, so do bear with me. It is alright and nothing wrong. It probably is a social conditioning in the "PUA" kingdom". And most times, social conditioning creeps into you without you even knowing, If you are truly enjoying the process, you would not feel an inch of incongruency. Think aobut it. If in any case you feel incongruent in the field, uncomfy...or whatever...it is not your skills, or what you did, or what you said. It is your purpose. YOU GOT IT ALL MESS UP.
This is what most guys do:
Primary purpose ----> Polish up skillset
Secondary purpose ----> Enjoying a genuine interaction/making new friends
I'm not saying this is what you should do, or "do not". It's basically my interpretation of this issues. Beliefs change they are never a constant. If they were a constant, evolution probably can never take place. The face that the primary purpose of most guys is to polish their skills, creates a gaping hole in them which allows critisisms to take place. Criticisms can be rejections etc. And not many guys can learn from it the smart way.
Enjoying the process simply means enjoying the process. Nothing else. In order to do that, your attention and purpose has to be ONE. Your primary purpose allows your full attention to flow into your doing...and your secondary purpose is whatever you want to achieve through the doing. Which obviously is the outcome.
This is what i do:
Primary purose ----> Enjoying a genuine interaction/making new friends
Secondary Purpose ----> Polish up skill set
When you take a step, it is your primary purpose. And the destination is your secondary purpose. In many cases, me being guilty of it in the past, i was not really enjoying my interactions with people in the clubs and on the streets. I was desperately sourcing out for indicators of interest and what not. So i could further calibrate myself what a dumb ass i am and it does not mean you neglect what needs to be done on a practical level. It does not mean ignorance. In fact, the doing and process becomes much easier, when the dimensions of attention is acknowledges and so becomes primary . Quality requires attention. Sometimes when I'm whacked, i get shitty results in field. And its great that i have the ability to identify the dysfunction in me at that moment and immediately rectify the whole interaction. Every time was genuine. Nothing was memorized. And often guys asked "what did you say?" "How many indicator of interest did she give?". My answer I DON'T KNOW. It was fun. That's it. I figured a long time ago, that there are probably two ways for me to evolve my game.
1) Be an ass about dynamics, break it down like a robot and get good results, but in me i feel nauseous and burn out.
2) Follow my senses, purpose and enjoy the freaking process of getting to know another human being, sacrificing a little percentage of success rates. But feel congruent and genuine deep down. And even if the approach did not work out, it doesn't affect me.
I chose the second one. It was touch choice. The mental masturbation was terrible. But i recognise a fact. I am human.
Enjoying the processes, over destinations. After all aren't we all searching for that one thing? Happiness? Physical relationships are simply awesome by products of great interaction. It is not an end. By realizing that your entire life journey consists of the step you are taking at this moment. There is only this one step and so you will give your fullest attention to it. This doesn't mean you don't know where you are going. It just means this step is primary, the destination is secondary. What you encounter at your destination once you get there depends on the quality of this one step.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Grooming and Fashion
Grooming and fashion play an important part in being successful with women in Singapore and in other parts of Asia. Women notice your appearance. They judge it in a couple of seconds and they can tell if something is out place or just plain ugly. And because your dress sense and grooming convey an identity to women, in this post we will be talking about a few general guidelines for grooming and fashion.
Nails:
Keep your finger and toenails trimmed and neat. It's necessary to keep them trimmed, neat and free of dirt as women will notice it immediately. It communicates what kind of a person you are. Whether are you someone that is neat and is ale to take good care of himself.
Hair Style:
Get your hair cut at least once a month unless you are planning to keep your hair long. Always have your hair trimmed and neat. It important to get a good hair style that fits you. I'd suggest going to a expensive salon to get a free consultation, find out what would be the best hair style for your face shape and your hair type. And if your pockets are not blessed with deep pockets go to a cheaper salon to get it done.
Clothes:
Get a girl to go shopping with you, it one of the best things you can do. Women tend to have a better fashion sense compared to guys. Get their opinion and advice on what type of clothes look best on you and what kind of style will fit you. Get clothes that fit your frame and look. Read Fashion magazines on how to dress awesome and the latest trend in Singapore.
Shoes:
Women interpret how you will treat her by the condition of your shoes, believe it or not. So go out there and get some awesome shoes. I recommend getting shoes that are the same color as your belt. Unless you know what you are doing it better to get them the same color. Also bearing in mind you want to keep your shoes in good condition at all times and always polish it and get it cleaned up.
Accessories:
By putting on a few accessories that communicate who you are differentiates you out from every other guy in Singapore. Note: You don't want to put on too many accessories. You will be classified as a weird dude, that doesn't know what he's doing. Find accessories like rings, bracelet, watch, necklace that fits the style you are going for.
Nails:
Keep your finger and toenails trimmed and neat. It's necessary to keep them trimmed, neat and free of dirt as women will notice it immediately. It communicates what kind of a person you are. Whether are you someone that is neat and is ale to take good care of himself.
Hair Style:
Get your hair cut at least once a month unless you are planning to keep your hair long. Always have your hair trimmed and neat. It important to get a good hair style that fits you. I'd suggest going to a expensive salon to get a free consultation, find out what would be the best hair style for your face shape and your hair type. And if your pockets are not blessed with deep pockets go to a cheaper salon to get it done.
Clothes:
Get a girl to go shopping with you, it one of the best things you can do. Women tend to have a better fashion sense compared to guys. Get their opinion and advice on what type of clothes look best on you and what kind of style will fit you. Get clothes that fit your frame and look. Read Fashion magazines on how to dress awesome and the latest trend in Singapore.
Shoes:
Women interpret how you will treat her by the condition of your shoes, believe it or not. So go out there and get some awesome shoes. I recommend getting shoes that are the same color as your belt. Unless you know what you are doing it better to get them the same color. Also bearing in mind you want to keep your shoes in good condition at all times and always polish it and get it cleaned up.
Accessories:
By putting on a few accessories that communicate who you are differentiates you out from every other guy in Singapore. Note: You don't want to put on too many accessories. You will be classified as a weird dude, that doesn't know what he's doing. Find accessories like rings, bracelet, watch, necklace that fits the style you are going for.
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